The Monkey Wrench Gang by Edward Abbey

The Monkey Wrench Gang by Edward Abbey

Author:Edward Abbey [Abbey, Edward]
Language: eng
Format: epub, azw3, mobi
ISBN: 9781417646494
Publisher: Bt Bound
Published: 1975-01-01T05:00:00+00:00


16

Saturday Night in America

Time for logistical maneuvering. All agreed (including Doc) that Doc should return to Albuquerque and tend his patients for a while, cash their checks (the patients’ checks) and replenish the supply column.

Bonnie didn’t want to go back to the office and who could blame her? She wanted to stay with Smith and Hayduke for the next adventure. Whatever it might be.

But Doc cannot drive a car, or pretends he cannot, or is at any rate unwilling to drive a car. It was necessary, therefore, to drive him to the nearest airport—Page, in this case—for the flight back to New Mexico. He left reluctantly, grumbling, drinking too much, eyes wet with sentiment, embracing his three comrades each in turn, Smith first.

“Smith,” he says, “old Seldom Seen, I’m counting on you to look after these children. They’re both crazy, you know, and innocent and absolutely helpless. You’re the grown-up in this ménage. Take care of them.”

Smith pats Doc on the back. “We’ll do all right, Doc. Don’t you worry none.”

“Try to keep George from getting himself killed.”

“I’ll do that, pardner.”

“Keep a sharp eye on Bonnie too. I think she’s catching Hayduke’s Disease.”

“I’ll keep both eyes on her, never you fear.”

“Good man. Remember this: Though the way is hard, the hard is the way. Our cause is just (just one damn thing after another) and God’s on our side. Or vice versa. We’re up against a mad machine, Seldom, which mangles mountains and devours men. Somebody has to try and stop it. That’s us. Especially you.”

“You bet, Doc. You make some money now and hurry back.” Smith grinned. “Don’t forget the houseboats and the trained dolphins.”

“My God,” says Doc, “you’re all crazy. Next!”

George Washington Hayduke, muy hombre, muy macho pendejo, steps forward. Dr. Sarvis draws him somewhat away from the others. “George,” he says, “step aside here for a minute.”

“It’s all right, Doc, I know what you’re going to say.” Hayduke, burly as a beer barrel, reeking of sweat and dust and beer as always, looks almost … well, anxious. “Listen, Doc—”

“No, you listen to me.”

“No, listen, this wasn’t my idea. I never wanted her to come in the first place. She’s nothing but trouble.”

Doc smiled, his arm around Hayduke’s brawny shoulders. Like hugging a linebacker. The bear and the buffalo, buffaloed. “George,” he says, “listen carefully. I am forty-nine and a half years old. Over the hill. Bonnie knows it. You take her. It’s your turn.”

“I don’t want her.”

“Don’t lie to me, George. Take her. If you can, that is. If you’re man enough. Take her and my blessings on you both. Don’t give me any argument.”

Hayduke stared at the ground, silent for a moment, actually embarrassed. “Old Seldom, he’s the one really wants her.”

“Smith has a head on his shoulders. He’s a man of taste and good sense. Not a fool like you. Let him take her then. Make a real ass of yourself.”

Hayduke flushed. “I’m sure as hell not going to fight over her. I got more interesting things to do than that.



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